The Slack Emoji That Didn’t Pay My Rent

The Ironic Loop of Wellness

I’ve been thinking about the 15-minute ‘mindfulness’ sessions my company started offering last year. They scheduled them for 2:45 PM on Tuesdays, which is exactly when the weekly reports are due. So, the only people who could attend were the managers who didn’t actually do the reports. The rest of us sat at our desks, listening to the muffled sound of a Tibetan singing bowl coming from the conference room while we frantically typed.

The Cycle of Stress Creation

Later that day, we all got an email ‘recognizing’ our commitment to wellness. They create the stress, then they offer a superficial solution to the stress, then they praise us for ‘engaging’ with the solution. It’s 15 shades of nonsense.

Echo A.J. often says that elder care is the ‘canary in the coal mine’ for the rest of the workforce. If we can’t treat the people who look after our parents with basic financial dignity, what hope do the rest of us have in our cubicles?

Breaking the Script

I’ve started responding to ‘kudos’ with polite inquiries about budget adjustments. When I’m told I’m a ‘vital part of the team’ in a public forum, I send a private message asking if that vitality will be reflected in my next performance review.

I would rather be the ‘difficult’ employee who asks for a raise than the ‘rockstar’ who can’t pay her electric bill.

There is a world where recognition is quiet, personal, and tangible. It’s the manager who sees you’re drowning and takes two projects off your plate without making a scene about it. It’s the company that realizes inflation is at 7 percent and gives an 8 percent cost-of-living adjustment without being asked. You owe me more than a GIF of a cat doing a dance. We need to stop applauding the performance and start demanding the substance.

The Choice: Performance or Substance

🎭

Applauding the Performance

Clutching digital trophies while the building burns.

🛠️

Demanding the Substance

A raise, resources, and respect for time.

We need to stop applauding the performance and start demanding the substance. Otherwise, we’re just watching a play while the building burns down around us, clutching our digital trophies while we look for the exit.